Chosen Artist:
jokes
A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening
to her son playing with his new airplane in the living room. She heard her
son said, "All of you sons of bitches get the hell off the plane now,
cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are
getting on, get your asses in the plane, cause we're going to take-off
now."
The mother went in and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language
in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there
for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your plane, but I want
you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son comes out of the
bedroom and resumes playing with his plane. Soon the mother heard her son
say, "All passengers who are deplaning, please remember to take all of
your belongings with you. We thank you for flying with us today and hope
your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will fly with us again soon."
She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask
you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is
no smoking on the plane. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing
journey with us today."
As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are
pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen."
Finally, when the airplane has less than 20 feet of runway left,
there is a sudden change in the pitch of the shouts as everyone
screams at once, and at the very last moment the airplane lifts
off and is airborne.
Up in the cockpit, the copilot breathes a sigh of relief and
turns to the pilot: "You know, one of these days the passengers
aren't going to scream, and we're gonna get killed!