Chosen Artist:
jokes
A plane was taking off from Kennedy. After it reached a comfortable
cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the
intercom, "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to
Flight number 293, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather
ahead is good and therefore we should have a smooth flight, Now sit back
and relax. - OH MY GOD!"
Silence
Then, the captain came back on the intercom and said: "Ladies and
Gentlemen, I an so sorry if I scared you earlier, but while I was talking
the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee
in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!"
A passenger in Coach said: "That's nothing. He should see the back of
mine!"
An airline pilot was scheduled to take a flight from New York to Los Angeles. The weather was too bad in New York to allow his usual on time departure. The weather in New York finally cleared and the pilot asked for
his departure clearance. He was very dismayed to hear that he had another delay due to the increased traffic now leaving New York.
Sometime later he finally received his clearance and decided he would try to make up the time lost by asking for a direct route to Los Angeles. Halfway across the country he was told to turn due South. Knowing that this turn would now throw him further behind schedule he inquired, quite
agitated, to the controller for the reason of the turn off course. The controller replied that the turn was for noise abatement.